Genesis 2:18, "Then the LORD God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.'"
A woman after God's own heart is a woman who carefully cultivates a servant spirit, whether she is married or not. She desires to follow in the steps of Jesus, who "did not come to be served, but to serve" (Matthew 20:28). Of course, if you are a married woman, that attitude and service starts at home with your family. And more specifically, with your husband.
God has designed the wife to be her husband's helper, and a helper is one who shares her man's responsibilites, responds to his nature with understanding and love, and wholeheartedly cooperates with him in working out the plan of God.
Since marriage is a partnership designed by God, we must go to Him and ask, "How, Lord, can I develop a heart committed to service, a heart intent on emulating You in service to another person? How can I take action in order to prove my desire to serve my husband?"
Here are some proven steps to take as you seek to be a "suitable helper."
1. Make a commitment to help your husband. Let your words reflect your decision to help your husband be successful, to be a team with him, and to make helping him the priority focus of your every day.
2. Focus on your husband. God wants us wives to focus our energy and efforts on our husbands. Each of us is to focus on his tasks, his goals, his responsibilities.
Ask: "What can I do for you today?"
Ask: "What can I do to help you make better use of your time today?"
3. Ask of your actions, Will this help or hinder my husband? That simple question can be a good lens through which to look at how we act in our marriages.
Helping is a simple and noble assignment - and it reaps rich rewards. Living out God's assignment certainly benefits our husbands and anyone else we serve, but we benefit as well as we learn to serve as Christ did.
Philippians 2:7, "but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men."
Matthew 20:26-28, "It is not this way among you, but whoever wishes to become great among you shall be your servant, and whoever wishes to be first among you shall be your slave; just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many."
The Lord Jesus is our ultimate example of One Who served. Because being a servant is a sign of Christian maturity, we must ask ourselves if we are truly ready for it. If so, you must set your heart on it.
In your marriage, do you see yourself as a team player, free of any competitive actions, thoughts, or desires? Is bettering your husband's life your primary concern? Is helping your husband the main focus of your energy?
Pray this prayer.
Lord, my desire is to be the helper to my husband that you designed me to be. Help me, Lord, take the steps necessary to become a better team player. Amen.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
A Heart That Serves
Posted by Karen Brock at 9:42 PM
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4 comments:
This last year I read the book Created to be His Helpmeet which emphasized a wife serving her husband and it radically transformed our marriage. These can be tough subjects, but everyone deserves the blessings that come with obeying God's word.
I agree with you Marika. I read the first couple chapters of that book and what an impact it made on our marriage, that first hour and day I read it. It may seem that it swings one direction, but that's not always a bad thing, to focus on my part only. It's always good to be soft toward insights and humble toward hard subjects. There is always grace with that sort of softness/humility, which is so powerful in our lives and in the lives around us (especially our husbands and kids).
We are all supposed to serve one another as Christians. I think we need to get our information and teaching out of the Bible and not from books that some people heve written. The Pearls are not people whose books the young women in the church should be basing their marriages on. They are very patriarchal and their book on raising children was cited on Amazon.com as promoting child abuse. Okay, so I ranted.
It's okay if you ranted. I think that the best thing that each of us can do when we come upon a tough subject, one about which we have differing and strong opinions is exactly what you addressed: we should consult our Bibles. And then we must ask ourselves, "In the light of my past, present and future, what is the wise thing for me to do?"
My favorite authors are the ones that I believe apply the Word of God accurately in their deductions and then counsel others according to what they've learned. I then usually stay with those authors and trust them, realizing all the while that each one is a fallible human being and, therefore, can be mistaken.
I suffer the consequences when I bounce around from one author to another only because I like the title of the book, for instance.
I hope that you haven't tossed this Bible Study aside because we're exploring a topic that is sensitive. I love the fact that you're reading it.
Please feel free to comment more, or to just e-mail me at karen-brock@comcast.net.
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